When you’re in sixth form or college a lot of pressure is put on you to go to university, taking an apprenticeship or job or taking a gap year. According to your teachers anyone who doesn’t do anything, was considered to be messing up their lives completely. The logical and only option for me was starting university with no gap year.

Yes, I had a job and could have continued working there if I had wished but, I would have killed myself after killing everyone else who walked through the door. Customer service, you just can’t beat it!

So instead I upped my sticks and moved 300 miles away to a tiny city, if you can even call it that, to a cute little place called Bangor University. A brilliant uni set in a brilliant location, but anyway this isn’t a story about how wonderful my university is. This is me explaining the start of your university life, the real first day that the uni, teachers, parents and friends don’t really prepare you for. It is heart-breaking leaving your home and your parents, you will cry and you will be sad, even if you hate your life and your parents and all of the other clichés that come with normal teenage life.

But now you’ve had the car journey there and moved all of your stuff inside, you are hot and you are sweaty and your parents are tearful. You can’t wait for them to go so the awkwardness is gone and you can start being independent, but at the same time it KILLS you that they are leaving. This is it, you are by yourself. And now they are gone, you have that killer question in your head, ‘Do I introduce myself to my new flat mates or do I unpack my stuff, and if I unpack my stuff do I start in the kitchen or my room.’

Simple answer? Unpack your stuff ASAP and start in your room. Otherwise you’ll go into the kitchen, meet people and feel awkward leaving them as you’re trying to sort your room out. Just don’t spend too long in your room. You only have one night to make bonds and good impressions but you have a whole year to sort your room out. The last thing you want is the rest of your flat getting to know each other whilst you’re still pulling your Disney pyjamas out your suitcase.

Without a doubt, your university will put on an event to get everyone together and bonding so you make friends for life, YAY! But instead, it is awkward, you don’t know anyone, you barely even remember the name of that girl you live with, and I can promise you that 99.99% of all the random people you talk too, yeah, you’ll never see them again.

So the awkward uni event comes to an end and you had back to your flat and this is when the drinking begins, not that I condone the inappropriate use of alcohol to improve on your night at all, be drink aware people! But anyway, back home with your friends you drink till you are drunk, and then you drink some more. Your aim is to have fun and if you look like an idiot, who cares? You’re with your friends and they love you. In fact you’re the biggest comedy genius around when you’ve had a few to many, or at least that’s the case in your own eyes, (*psst* don’t worry, I know you’re secretly the next Michael McIntyre.)

But of course, this is different at uni, everything is, my dear, you are about to have the most awkward drinking experience of your life, and you will play ring of fire whether you like it or not.  And if you like it now, you won’t in a few weeks, believe me when I say Ring of Fire defines the word overplayed.

You feel yourself getting drunk, but can you show this? HELL NO. Heaven forbid people think that you’re a lightweight and you don’t want to be acting silly and giving people the wrong impression now. So you restrain yourself, you keep drinking but act as sober as possible and obviously this is convincing, you’re the world’s best actor/actress, remember?

You continue to drink till someone suggests heading out, so you go to the club and queue for ages and then hopefully, after paying a silly price because you forgot to buy your ticket, you finally get in. The walk down has sobered you up and no one else seems to be wanting to buy a drink, so you hit the dance floor throw out some killer moves, or not, because you’re awkwardly sober and with people you don’t know well enough to dance with let alone bump and grind.

Thankfully the night comes to a quick end.

You head home with a portion of cheesy chips in hand feeling tired yet accomplished.

You have just survived your first day at university.

Congratulations.