The Art of Confidence


All my life I haven’t exactly been the most confident of people but through growing up, I have learnt that the older we get the wiser and more confident we become. It just takes time believe me. You may feel like you are in a bad place or that nothing ever good comes your way but the saying good things come to those who wait isn’t just a myth.

As a child, I suffered a lot from low self-esteem and had myself convinced I was the only one. However, I know this is not the truth and that anyone, even those who look confident from the outside, could well be suffering with their own issues of self-doubt. The problem we need to pinpoint is why this occurs and how to stop it.

For many, a lack of confidence comes from being bullied. Having been through this myself, I know how much it knocks your confidence to be called names and tormented to the point where you don’t know if you can deal with it any longer but seriously don’t let anything bring you down. Confidence is a fickle thing and is hard to tame but there are ways we can hone it.

One is to surround yourself with people you love. The fact that you know these people care about you only increases your confidence and makes you feel needed by somebody. These are the people that know you are an amazing person and aren’t afraid to tell you. Never push these people away since they are only trying to help and if it feels like your confidence is only ebbing then give it time, it takes a while to build up.

Do something you love. This is a brilliant remedy as you can take pleasure from knowing you are good at something which in turn makes you feel confident about it. Finding a passion in life can sometimes be tricky, although not for me since luckily I knew what I wanted to do from a young age but for those of you who don’t, trying something new always works. Challenging yourself is vital to becoming a more confident person. What is life without a few obstacles? Failing only makes ourselves stronger.

Personally, moving away to university was one of my biggest challenges and did I find it challenging? Sure, every single second and did I survive? Yes, every battle made me a stronger, more confident person and I’m glad for every moment I persevered because it paid off. It changes you as a person, as will life in general and confidence is one of those rare qualities that some people possess too much of and others lack in dramatically. The trick is to find a balance. In fact, isn’t life about balancing in every sense of the word?

Confidence is having faith in yourself. Easier said than done, I know but it’s a wonderful thing once you have a little of it. Things will start to change slowly but surely, not only in yourself but in your life. You will open up more and become more confident about socialising. You might become more accepting of family and understand there are people who care about you including a boyfriend/girlfriend. Some of that might only be me but take a good look at your life and question whether you are fully at peace with yourself. Is someone or something knocking your confidence? Because, if so, it needs to change and now. I have seen so many friends suffer because of various factors in their life putting them down. Don’t let others dictate your life. Make some changes and start living your life. You might be surprised at the happiness it brings and yes we know the saying all good things must come to an end but maybe one day that might just change.

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