Relationships can be a funny topic, there’s no right or wrong answers as every couple is different. Even if some friends may not agree with it, as long as you feel healthy in the relationship that’s the most important thing.
While the early months of the relationship feel exciting and effortless, to make it long-term there needs to be a long compromise of effort between both parties to make it work. This is when issues can arise, after the short-term becomes long-term, and you know each other almost too well, and you are used to that person being around you, and you feel comfortable around each other. The choices you make in life can rely on this relationship, and this determines whether you are in a healthy or unhealthy relationship.
You’re not sure if you feel healthy in the relationship?
First of all, I must mention by saying that everyone argues, so if you thinking myself and my partner aren’t healthy because we argued about the washing up.. no that’s the opposite, it’s perfectly healthy. We all bicker and all have opinions, some are more stubborn that others, that’s just life! It’s when decisions arise, and your priority may just be your partner, and that stops you from doing what you want to do.
Especially for young people like me, a lot of students decide to stay at a ‘local’ University just for the sake of being with their boyfriend, and then they end up breaking up anyway.. this is something many people regret. I think the main point to bring up is that, yes it’s hard as you love your partner very much, but at the end of the day, if you were single, would you have gone to another Uni somewhere far away? Most likely the answer would be yes.
The whole point of being in a relationship is to only make your life better, and it’s a luxury to have found someone.
The worry is when many people believe that they will ‘ruin’ their relationship if they go away to University. Firstly, it tests your relationship, whether your in a healthy relationship and if you are actually supposed to be with each other. Secondly, if that person really loves you, why would they be that selfish? I am not saying move abroad to another country and go to University there, as that would obviously make it hard to see each other at all. I am saying, don’t just base your decision on your boyfriend/girlfriend. They obviously come into the equation, but it’s unhealthy to just give up on your hopes and dreams for the rest of your life. Having said that, if you actually feel genuinely happy with your local University, the of course do what ever makes you happy.
Trust is definitely the most important and valuable thing a healthy relationship needs. If you don’t have trust, your whole relationship is on edge and never at rest. If you don’t like your partner talking to the opposite sex, or have to constantly contact them on a night out to make sure they are up to no good, that is lack of trust.
Being in a relationship just means you don’t have to worry about the one off night kisses, because you know you have a long-term relationship you can be proud of.
It’s just when you can’t enjoy yourself without them, and they have to know what you are doing 24/7 because they are worried you will cheat. Everyone deserves someone they can trust, so if they give you a reason not to trust them, then they are not worth it.
Do you think you have some of these issues? There are always ways of working on it, you can give it time, just don’t give it too much time. Because next thing you know it, your 80, sat in your rocking chair, thinking what have I been doing all my life? (Hopefully that’s not going to be the case.) At the end of the day, finding someone is great, you just both need to commit!! If so, good on you both!
Please give your honest views, I would love to hear them!