Social Media is great! It’s revolutionising everything! It has changed the way we connect and document our lives drastically! What a wonderful invention! Except for those moments where it just makes you hate people.
Especially when they put stuff like ~it’s not about waiting for the storm to pass, it’s about learning to dance in the rain~. YOU ARE 10 AND YOU HAVE AN IPAD please shut up and go play with some barbies. And don’t get me started on duckface selfies. You may have been born too late to be part of the MySpace generation, but you sure are going to great pains to carry on the worst parts of its legacy.
2. Ridiculous trending topics on Twitter.
Why does Justin Bieber’s hamster dying have to trend? Why on earth would I want to #prayforchrisbrown? Trending Topics are a great way to keep a pulse on what the world is discussing, what people in different parts of the world cant stop talking about…but they are also a great way to remind yourself how crazy One Direction fans can be, as well.
3. ‘Wat’ ‘2morrow’ ‘Dis’ and all that text speak.
Really, now. Wat can be transformed into What by typing one letter. ONE LETTER. O N E L E T T E R.
4. Proud Mummy to be.
Oh, how lovely, you’re having a baby. But does it REALLY need to be your middle name on Facebook? No. No it does not. On that note, ‘Attend Hogwarts School Of Witchcraft and Wizardry’ is the most un-original thing ever at this point.
5. Notifications inviting you to play games.
There’s always one who will send you a request every day asking for more coins on something or other. Always one.
6. It’s en route.
Not ON route.
7. That one person you follow on Twitter who feels the need to tweet celebrities all the time.
Sure, it’s pretty cool if you get an @ reply from someone you’re a fan off. But you tweeting your favourite celebrities in your desperation to get noticed is giving me serious second hand embarrassment right now. Stop. Please.
8. That one person you have on Facebook who feels the need to update about EVERYTHING they do.
I really do not need to know what you are watching on TV this evening followed by what take away you are getting followed by how your nights sleep was followed by how you feel about the weather today followed by…. Clearly this is why Facebook added a ‘Hide posts from’ feature.
9. Older family members on Facebook.
It happens to all of us. You write one status about how you’re looking forward to going out tonight, and your grandparent comments with ‘Hope you have a nice time. Where are you going. How is the rest of the family. We are fine. Weather has been nice lately. You are growing up so well.’
10. ‘Like/Share this to show respect.’ ‘One like = one prayer.’ ‘Share this if you support gay marriage!’
Um, no. Just because I do not share your picture does not mean I’m against gay marriage. And I hardly doubt me liking that status is going to make a difference to the baby who has to undergo heart surgery. I’m all for social media being used to raise awareness or for a good cause but DON’T try and guilt me into stuff thank you very much.